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Candle Jokes That Will Light Up Your World!

These enlightening candle-based jokes are sure to be the highlight of your day!

Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  November 5th 2023

Any other jokes you've heard won't hold a candle to these ones! You'll be light-headed from laughing at these de-light-ful gags! So, what are you waiting for - don't leave these jokes unattended!

Prefer some more modern jokes? Here are some about electricity! Or give these lift jokes and mechanic jokes a go!

I went to a candle sale event last night…

It was lit!

Why did the candle feel dizzy?

Because he was light-headed!

Why do we blow out our birthday candles?

So we don't burn our mouths when we eat the cake!

What happened when Joseph Swan came up with the idea of the lightbulb?

A candle appeared over his head!

Why did the candle quit his job?

He was burned out!

What did the little candle say to the big candle?

“I’m going out tonight!”

Where do candles like to go on their day off?

The Wax Museum!

Why do we put candles on top of the birthday cake?

Because it would be too hard to put them on the bottom!

My friend wants to start a business where he sells unscented candles…

I told him his idea made no scents!

How do you know when you’re getting old?

The candles cost more than the cake!

What’s it called when a candle eats another candle?


What does a candle do when it gets fired?

It has a meltdown!

What do you call a man who’s just had every candle stolen from his house?


I took my new girlfriend to see the world’s oldest candle, but it didn’t go well…

Turns out you shouldn’t introduce a new love to an old flame!

What burns longer – a red candle or a blue one?

Neither – they both burn shorter!

What do you get when you put a candle inside a suit of armour?

A knight light!

How do angels light a candle?

With a match made in heaven!

How do you make a candle happy?

Blow it out, it’ll be delighted!

What do you call a particularly evil candle?


Why couldn’t the candle fall asleep?

Because there’s no rest for the wick-ed!